A valuable lesson

I learned a valuable lesson last week. Its a lesson I have learned before, and will probably need to learn again, but an important one nonetheless.

As mentioned in a previous post, I have recently relocated offices (same firm, different location). I am prevented from talking about the real reason for this move - to anyone other than the official firm channels I went through to get the move. From the outside looking in, the move was sudden, unexpected, unexplained and potentially unexplainable -at least to the staff members in the office I left - some of which I had considered friends, and all of which (with one notable exception) I had considered good professional colleagues. I didnt want to make this move either - but was put in a situation where I just could stay no longer.

As it turns out, the move has been a good thing - professionally and personally in terms of how much I enjoy my work day to day.

However, I have lost the respect of colleagues (particularly junior staff) and the friendships I thought I had with other colleagues. This has been brought home to me in a number of ways since I moved (late September) but most recently in the form of 360 degree feedback we received as part of an annual thing that is done for all partners. The comments received in mine from junior staff were all along the same lines - recriminations for me having 'deserted' my previous office after all the support I had received from that office.

These comments are borne from ignorance. I know that. But they still hurt. Especially coming from people who I thought knew me better than that.

The important lesson that I learned from it is that things aren't always as they appear, and that we can really hurt others by judging, and acting on those judgements, without knowing all the facts. For someone like me, who has a tendency to be critical and jump to conclusions - see Meme responses a few posts ago - this is something I need to work at.